Losing

I've pretty much cried every day for the past erm, 6 weeks? Maybe more, maybe less.

My eyeballs hurt and I can barely see any more. Infact, I can't really hear too well either. Think my senses are shutting down.

Will have to ask for help tomorrow. The health visitor is coming for the first time. I shall have to unleash on a stranger and beg her to try and fix me. Between sobs and wiping away the snot, I shall try to convince her that it's not post natal depression, but the result of a difficult few years.

I can't find a way to correctly ask my husband for help in a way that he understands and doesn't feel threatened by.

Can't get a word in edgeways to ask my friend for help.

I'm not even sure who can help me.

I just want to feel safe and loved. No doctor or health visitor will be able to do that. Only my OH I guess. He doesn't want to and doesn't know how to though.

It's an epic fail of a situation